This DID NOT just happen....

I could just say....

"Jaiya's two."

And leave it at that, and most of you would know exactly how this little one is acting, but I can't do that. She needs to read this one day. I have been at my wits end at times, ready to pull out my hair, but I just know that this all has to be documented so we will laugh hysterically together at what her poor Mom and Dad went through.

The purpose of this post is to tell you about Sunday. A Sunday that was more eventful than I'd hoped.

To set all of this up, you must know that I woke up in a terrific mood. I was so happy finals were over, and we had a great night watching a movie with friends the night before. Dustin was still in bed, cause he works his last night shift that night, and I was surprisingly on good track to get us to church in time. Our church doesn't start until 12:30 and even with a later church, I miraculously find myself running late...imagine that. So. Here I am, running on time, I've already showered, made breakfast, a chocolate sippy, started laundry, ran Jaiya's bath water, and was ready to put her in the tub.

I go get her, put her in her nice warm bath water full of toys, and start on my make-up. She yells that she has to go potty, so I of course tell her to get out of the tub and go quickly....she does.

I run in to the kitchen super fast to get our lunch cooking...then I'm back to doing my make-up.

I heard her get back in the tub. And that's that.

Little did I know, that in about 30 seconds, my adrenaline was gonna kick in way above your average adrenaline rush, and I was going to be in sheer panic.

Next thing I hear, "Look Mama, the iPad'th bathin'!"

It's completely submerged.

"WHAT!!#$%#%#"

After that...I don't remember much but I grabbed the iPad, ran in to the bedroom with a towel in hand, yelling for Dustin to wake up...cause let's be honest, I can't go through an event like this alone if I don't have to. All the while, I'm shaking it like crazy to let the water drain out of the plug-in area. I'm literally shaking.

Now, it's important for you to know this as well. This iPad was not the cheapest of iPads. I've told Dustin a few times, along with many others, that we were stupid for buying the most expensive darned iPad out there. We didn't need the package deal thingy that allows you to hook up through your phone provider, cause we are switching companies now anyway. We also didn't need the gazillion more GB or whatever that we chose to stupidly get. This is mainly my fault. I get sold REALLY easy by those salesman in Best Buy. Well, any salesman really...

Dustin goes in to tell Jaiya that the iPad is ruined and that it was a gigantic NO NO for putting it in there, then....

The contraption that we have to hold our shampoos, conditioners, soap, razors, wash cloths (it stands in the corner and is anchored at the ceiling and the edge of the tub) comes crashing down on our poor daughter....

I get her out and love on her while Dustin fixes that mess...

Then I smell burning noodles.

Great. Dead iPad, big mess in the bathroom, and I burned lunch.

So, here we are, the iPad has been in rice since Sunday...Still works, but has water throughout the right side of the screen, and we are out nearly a grand for nothin'....

Sigh.

Let's hope that next Sunday is much more pleasant to us.

It's time...

For a change.

A BIG one.

One that will better me, and make me healthier and stronger than ever before.

Here's a low-down on why I'm so desperate for some kind of change. (Bare with me on this exhausting journey down memory lane....)
I've mentioned to you all that this past year I ended up in therapy due to panic attacks (happening nightly at its worst). It was horrible. The radiologist I work with just so happened to be in the room when I had a meltdown at work...He told me that I should just talk to someone for some relief. It worked. For about 5 months. Then, once MRI school started, (this all happens when my cup overflows apparently) I end up with an ulcer in my stomach, which leads to me losing 8 lbs in a month, and I lose my appetite. I later start getting wavy vision, and feel like my insides are shaking, with numb hands and feet. WHAT? I thought I fixed all of this...CRAP! So, I go to the doctor and to be safe we do an EKG, MRI of my brain, check my heart, blood pressure, labs...the works. Nothing. It was getting so frustrating. He then diagnosed it as anxiety attacks. So, he says..."You know, since you don't really want to be on any meds, you should try therapy again."
Well, guess what...I don't have time for therapy dude! Golly. It's like one thing after another. It's not like I even think there is any specific reason for all of this...it's just that I don't usually talk about things that stress me out, so he thinks it all builds up...true. But, while I do think I need to get back in therapy, I am also changing my lifestyle. Dustin swears it's all related to my diet. And...He's probably right!

It's my NEW YEAR'S RESOLUTION that I'm starting asap. Because I have the rest of December off from school, which means, I can get in to a routine without all the hustle and bustle of mommy, wifey, school, work duties happening all at once. Which has seemed to drain me physically. So, after December, I should have it down pretty good, and not have one more added thing weighing me down and compromising my end goal.

What is this goal you ask?

I'm changing all negative things in my life...

Food. I eat in such a way, that it's amazing I'm alive to tell about it. Fondant for breakfast and doritos for dinner is just not gonna cut it. It's no wonder why I am constantly battling for energy.

The next is more water. Or I guess I should say, start drinking water. I don't. I just don't. 1 gallon a day. No matter what.

The BIGGEST change of all...(this will shock the nation and possible cause a disaster or something huge like that) NO MORE POP. I mean it. I drink diet, which means no calories so therefore shouldn't be bad for you right? Wrong. I couldn't be more wrong. It's pathetic how horrible it is for you. Yes, I don't get sugar with diet soda, but what about the aspartame that is used in substances for embalming dead people. Sick. Sick sick sick. I'm disgusted. 52 oz of that shiz a day, and sometimes more. Gag me now! Blah!

I am also starting to take some vitamins: Vitamin C- Dandelion Root- Fish Oil- and Biotin. These I discovered at different times and for various reasons. But all are so good for you.

Excersise...say what?! Yes, excersise. It's important, even if I make every excuse known to man NOT to do it. It's important and I am starting now. I got some great advice from a friend to read the Bikini Body Mommy Challenge blog, and I got inspired.

Also, my hubby has been taking supplements and excersising like a freaking maniac, and I decided if we are both on board, it will be easier on both of us. I won't choose not to cook just cause I know it doesn't meet his "healthy" standards, and he doesn't have to eat healthy alone and be sabatoged by his rediculously unhealthy spouse. Win, win...

Next.

A healthy mind.

It sounds so weird but I truly think that a healthy mind leads to a healthy body, attitude, ....life. It's the best thing you can do. This I am not sure yet on what exactly I plan to do. But what I do know is that I can be my biggest obstacle. I say things to myself that set me up for failure without even doing it on purpose. Things like: "I am so fat."  "I am just not smart enough for this." "I can't juggle all of this." "I am so tired, weak and lazy all of the time."   It's so destructive and I've been working on it for years. The power of "The Secret" right? What you think you are, you will be...It's as simple as that. But, like I said, I have been working on this for a while now, but I hope 2013 will bring me some good changes and a healthier life...

I plan on updating on all of this too. Like the changes that are being made by doing all of this... Hopefully it will inspire someone else out there to make positive changes...

Ready. Setty (as Jaiya says). GO!

Jaiya's 2

Jaiya turned two yesterday, December 1st.

Time does not slow down for anything. Unfortunately. Sometimes I just want to pause, and enjoy all that is around me without all of the To Do's weighing on my mind.

Jaiya is the reason for this.

Everything she does & says is enough to make me want to take it all in and never let her out of my site, and sometimes I wonder why I even work so hard to get an education, when all that really matters is her.

Then reality sets in, and I realize, that's exactly why I do it. I do it for her and for her sweet daddy. All the weight shouldn't be on his shoulders alone.

These past 2 years have been nothing outside of pure joy. I still sometimes have to pinch myself at the thought that Dustin and I have created this little being. She is smart, funny, & wise beyond her years already.

Jaiya loves her Mom and Dad. Thank goodness, cause we all know that doesn't last forever. She loves singing: ABC's, Sunshine, Twinkle Twinkle, Popcorn Song, We Wish You a Merry Christmas, etc. She finds a way to get her toothbrush and toothpaste, because this is her favorite thing. She loves books, and babies, coloring, Dora, & princesses. She has a way of making mom feel better whenever tears are present...Jaiya becomes little mom and takes care of me. She adores her Papa's and Grandma's. She talks on the phone daily. She loves ONLY chocolate milk in her sippy. She loves to go to bed, or maybe loves isn't the right term, willingly goes to bed. She let's me know when she is tired and needs a nap. She loves Jesus, church, and she says the most precious little prayers I've ever heard. She likes her hair done. She loves rides in the car, at all hours of the day. She HAS to have a sucker every time I go to Holly's for my daily drink. She still knows way more Spanish than I have the ability to share with you all, cause I do NOT know what all of it means. She counts to 20. Her choice of room to destroy is the bathroom. She is friendly and will talk to anyone. She loves my iPad, and has pretty much taken it over. She is much better at using it than I am.

(Stat's will come after her 2 year doctor's appt.)

And to Jaiya....

Jaiya,
       I hope you always remember that there is opposition in all things. You will have some trials in life that seem to heavy to bear, but at the end of it all, the blessings are beyond what you could ever imagine. You should always remember that education is important, work hard in school, do the best you can, and the opportunities are endless. Boys will break your heart, but the hurt won't last for long. Friends can be mean, and make life seem really hard, but true friendships will always come through in the end. Be nice. It will make you even more beautiful than you already are. Beauty is only skin deep, but what matters is your true intent, your thoughts, feelings and compassion. Never give up. It's the easy way out on things, and your true potential for life will come with following through til the end, and giving it your all. Be real. Don't try to be like anyone else, cause there is only one, YOU. God made you, YOU, for a reason. Stay strong in the church. It is the only solid foundation  we have to get through this crazy life. Remember that family is everything. It comes first. All the worldly things in life will never measure up to the happiness family will bring you.

I am so so grateful beyond any expression for having you in my life. Thank you for showing me a new kind of love, and for being the best lil daughter ever. You have already taught me so much in life.

I love you princess. Happy Birthday.

Love,
Mom

I can't wait to share pics from Jaiya's princess party. She had such a good Birthday...