Saturday, August 24, 2013

Because I love "YOU."

As a parent, there is so much to teach a child before they are old enough to venture out in this big world on their own. But, more specifically, as a mother, I feel that I have a deep responsibility, one that I fear I won't live up to.

I wish I could just keep my little J-Bug wrapped in bubble wrap, and then surround her in a puncture proof bubble. No one could get to her. Physically, emotionally, spiritually...she'd be safe.

I know I'm not alone when thinking about my child's future. But one thing has been eating at me. Something I just want to get out some way or another, that Jaiya will probably need to read one day.

Every time I have sat down to blog about our summer, this comes to my mind. And, because it's so overwhelming and somewhat deep, I end up deciding to just bag the blogging altogether. Not because I don't want to write it, but trying to gather my thoughts on exactly how to put it and what to say is hard.

What I want to instill in my sweet baby girl is self-esteem.

We all do right?

It's so important. And whether we do our job as parent's to provide our children with the best self-esteem in the world, life may stab at it now and then, diminishing the little girl who had big dreams, the gumption to take a chance, and the naive thought that this world is nothing but full of good, and one big opportunity, and that being yourself is okay.

Trials and ignorant people can cause us to try to be someone or something we are not. And, how unfortunate that the wonderful individuality we each have to offer would be hidden away, scared of judgement.

My fear is that this little girl will one day not have the confidence to do these things the she dreams of doing, and most importantly, that she will not be who she is. Original.

In ways, I have experienced this. Because of things I've been through, heard, felt, whatever.... I led myself to believe that I wasn't smart enough to do this or that, or pretty enough, or skinny enough, or that my hair/clothing wasn't enough. And somewhere within all of the "not good enough's" I lost a huge chunk of my self-esteem, which is taking time to get back.

If it be the only thing I do in life, I will never hold back when telling my little girl she looks pretty, that she's taking great care of herself and her body, that she is so smart and can achieve anything she puts her mind to, that she is loving, kind, compassionate, a great example, fun to be around, and that failure is normal, and is only to better us. That she is talented. That mistakes are normal, no matter what she does, the Lord is on her side, as am I, and her dad. All of these things are things she should never doubt.

I don't agree that someone can have too much self-esteem. There's a difference between self-esteem and arrogance. And just by reinforcing the good in our child, arrogance won't be the result.

So, my Jaiya bug- By just being YOU, YOU are enough.
Love you to the moon.